Whoa. Where da F has this bitch been at? Well, to be straight wid you, da past year has been a lot of the same crap except when things got worse. Pacifically, I'm talking about Mom n Dad bringin' in Eden and Vegas, the FML dander farts that have ruined my life and have made me (almost) appreciate tard-bro cuz at least he's too mentally disabled to be a complete jerk. So you can get a sense of how much they SUCK here is some (old) photos of their sorry selves: Eden snoozing like a poop-wad in MY toys and Vegas passed out like some fugly fur frog on MY gold chair.
UGH. I hate to even acknowledge them in this blog. It is really hard to believe that I have been forced to endure their offensiveness for almost a whole year. What really blows my mind in a bad way is that mom n dad is both allergic! But mom was like, "What's good about kittens is that your immune system grows as they do." N Dad agreed cause does he really have the option of disagreeing with that tyrant? Unfortunately it was only about a month before mom's gaping pig nose did indeed stop running. Dang, dude. What about ME bein' allergic. I dry heave just from seeing Dad pet them.
Another thing that sucked harder than mom sucks down Diet Dr. Pepper is that mom n dad is both working "full time" now which feels a lot more like "all the time." Does anybody know what it's like to spend 9 hours straight trapped in the bedroom with THIS?!
All day long it's "Where does the water and blanket make it later?" and "Stella do you think the when I happen at salmon tonight?" The only thing that keeps me from chewing my ears off just for a frickin break from the verbal chesspool is knowing that out in the rest of the house is Eatme and Veg-ass so it could be worse.
Peace, honkies. You'll be hearing more from this ho.
